How Did Being An STPM Student Changed Me?

Hello! It's me again! Yes, the same old face greeting you with a more matured and improved self than 2 years ago (eg: look at my old posts to see my childishness).


I hope the SPM-leavers who hesitates to enrol as a Form 6 student will change their minds after reading my post. Why do I say that? Because I was just like you guys; I thought Form 6 was not cool, since we have to wear school uniform and studying in the school environment just like during Form 1 until Form 5, like tak cool lah pakai baju sekolah, dah lah belajar kat sekolah. Betul tak? If you tell me you NEVER had that perception about Form 6, I'm gonna give you a cookie for being a special snowflake who possess a different perspectives than other people. And no, I am not being sarcastic here LOL.


Okay, sarcasm aside, I think I can never thank my beloved mother enough for pushing me to accept the Form 6 admission offer and never failed to encouraged me to continue studying in Form 6 even though my heart was wavering at that time; watching my friends went to Matriculation and Universities. I mean, I was surrounded with people who looked down at me for taking Form 6 as a choice for me to continue my study; except for my mother and little brother. Heck, even my dad was saying I might have to face a rough journey to going to university because I took Form 6. It was like the whole World was against my choice at that time and thinking back, I shed a lot of tears because of the looks people gave me when I said I studied in Form 6.


It was hurtful enough, but as the proverb says, ''It takes both rain and sunshine to make a rainbow.'' I held on to that proverb and promised myself that I will study hard to make my mother happy and I dreamt of saying these words to my mother, "I am thankful that you encouraged me to take Form 6. I can't thank you enough." I want to make her proud of me for once after all these years of disappointment (except for when I took my PMR result, but that's another story).


Coming back to our title, how did being an STPM student changed me? I must say, it changed me in LOTS of ways that I can't ever imagine I would if you asked the 17-year-old me.


The list of things that changed in me are:

• I am able to think clearly and make more matured judgements than before. 
• I became more confident in expressing my own opinion and ideas. 
• I became a much more confident person who can talk to other people I just met without even feeling some kind of anxiety and fear. (This will be elaborated below) 
• I began to know more about the country and understand the economics section in news = having a wide knowledge in what happens around the world. 
• I am more than willing to try out for new things, as compared to the cowardly me in 2012. 
• I became a more hard working person than I ever were in the past years. 
• I started to realize the importance of doa and ibadah to Allah s.w.t to my everday life and success in studies. 
• I became fatter. (LOL but really!) 

For now, those are the only ones I can think of at the moment, but I am sure there are more of them. For the number 3 point, I was an extremely introvert person; I would only talk to my own group of friends and when I talk to other people outside of that circle, I would get scared as hell and had some kind of anxiety attack. I was really embarrassed to even talk to other people because I was too afraid they would think I am a nosy person and make them annoyed of me. Don't ask me why did I think like that, I don't even know.


I think Form 6 is my biggest turn in life; especially in my ibadah. Before, I would still pray 5 times a day but there are lots of times where I skipped one or two solat fardhu a day and I am still ashamed of myself for that until now. My PA teacher once told us this; "Kadang-kadang kita tak dapat A dalam exam sebab ibadah kita dengan Allah tu tak cukup." The moment I got my Penggal 3 results (which was really, utterly BAD), those words began to replayed in my head; it felt like someone gave me a hard slap at that time. From that time onwards, I started to change from someone who is lalai in solat to someone who put the importance to solat first before doing anything else every single day, and still trying to be a better Muslim.


Writing this post makes me think how bad I was before I entered Form 6. But really, if I did not accept that offer, would I still change, or will I stayed the same? I wondered about that countless times and I always felt thankful for my mom's encouragement.


Oh, and one more words to the SPM-leavers out there; you can now wear casual clothes if you enter Form 6, so I don't think there's a reason for you guys to be so adamant in not wanting to enter Form 6 LOL. Just think about it, STPM students has been proven to do better in universities than other students (this is what a lecturer and my seniors said), it clearly proves that STPM leavers possess more qualities than others.


And don't give me bullshits about your disagreement here, I am all open to healthy disagreements and discussions, but not childish arguments and mockery.



Until then, goodbye!
XOXO,
fiqa